How Long Did It Take To Break Your New Years Resolution This Year? You Havent Yet? You Are One Of The Rare Few.Why So Rare? Because Many Resolutions Are Made As A Cultural Customits What We Do Every Year At This Time. And For The Majority, The Custom Of Breaking A Resolution Is As Strong A Part Of The Tradition As Making It.In Their Hearts, Most People Expect It To Happen. As A Hypnotherapist, The Post-New Years Crowds Are Already Breaking Down My Doors. But Must We Behave The Same Way Every New Year? No. How To Prevent It Or Repair It? Read On.Mistakes We MakeThe Reasons We Often Fail At Keeping Our Resolutionthough Were Experts At Making Them!are The Following. Notice Which Of These Common Reasons Are Yours, And Then Choose To Make A Positive Change In The Resolutions You Select, How You Construct Them, And How You Share Them. Heres The Scoop On What Can Go Wrong And How To Avoid It.Mistake 1: The Resolution Is Too Complicated Or SevereIll Never Eat Another Candy Bar Again, Never-ever! Is Too Severe (unless Youve Been Strongly Advised By Your Doctor). Heres What Too-complicated Sounds Like: Ill Work Out Every Monday, Wednesday, And Friday, Unless Monday Is A Holiday, Or I Walk To Work Three Times Or More That Week, Or I Go Out Drinking And Cant Get Up Early Enough.The Logic May Be Sound, But Rather Than Including All Those Ifs, Ands, And Buts In Creating The Resolution, Go With The Flow As Life Happens. Figure Youll Work Out Three Times A Week. If You Wake Up Late One Morning, Get Up Early Another Day And Work Out Then Instead. Its Common Sense, But Many People Miss It.Overall Learning: If The Resolution Isnt Working, Re-think It.Mistake 2: Its All About What You Wont DoNothing About What You Will DoPeople Need A Good Mixture Of Dos And Donts, Wills And Wonts To Get The Job Done Right. Instead Of Just A List Of What You Wont Eat So As To Lose Weight, Also Include Your New Preferred Menu. For Some Of Us The Preferred Items Alone Will Do The Job. But Knowing Only What Youre Cutting Out, And Nothing About What Youre Including In, Makes Jane A Sad, Confused Girl.So If You Want To Lose That Extra Weight, Say Something: I Will Emphasize Fruit, Vegetables And Sugar-free Drinks As Snacks, And Move Away From Sugary, Fatty Snacks. If Youre Like Many Of My Clients, Thinking Only Of The First Half (what You CHOOSE To Eat) Is Sufficient. That Way You Need Not Concentrate On What Youre Losing Out On. Know Yourself And Experiment.Side Note: Just Declaring What You Will Do Isnt Sufficient; Youll Also Need To Make That Trip Down The Fruit And Veggie Aisle.Overall Learning: Turn A Wont Do Resolution Into Something That Will Give You Directiona Will Do Resolution!Mistake 3: Youre Denying An Important Need Or DesireIf You Overeat, Over-drink, Or Have Sex With People You Dont Really Want To Be Having Sex With, Theres Probably Something Youre Missing. A Need That Is Going Unfulfilled. Have An Honest Talk With Yourself, A Smart And Loyal Friend, Or A Counselor, Therapist Or Hypnotist, And Find That Thing, And Get It Fulfilled In Some Healthy Way. You May Need Time To Work Through It, But Thats Okay; The Rewards Will Be Great.Ignore It And That Undesirable Behavior Will Keep Returning, Sometimes More Fiercely.Overall Learning: Figure Out Whats Been Left Unfulfilled And Work On Getting It Satisfied Or Restructured Positively.Mistake 4: You Expect To FailAn Old Friend Of Mine Used To Make A Resolution Every New Year To Lose 15 Pounds And Keep Them Off. Sometimes She Lost Them, And Sometimes She Didnt, But The New Body Never Lasted. Now That Ive Been A Hypnotist For Around 10 Years, The Reason Is Obvious.She Always Said Something Like This: Im Going To Lose That 15 Pounds This Year, I Hope Or Im Going To Try To Lose Those 15 Pounds Or Im Going To Take Off The 15 Poundsat Least For A While.Notice How She Built Failure Into Every One Of Those Resolutions. Frankly, Resolutions Are The Closest Thing To Hypnotic Suggestions. Build In Failure And Youve Practically Hypnotized Yourself To Fail.Overall Learning: Ask Yourself What Kind Of Support, Help, Or Learning You Need To Succeed; Then Proceed To Get Them.Mistake 5: Youre Not Getting Support Or Youre Getting Negative SupportWhether Your Quest This Year Is To Lose Weight, Run A Triathalon, Get A Great New Job, Or Find A Life Partner, Tell Only People Who Will Support You. If The Friend Or Relative Is Unsupportive, Envious, Or Spiteful Regarding Your Endeavor, Dont Use Him Or Her As A Sounding Board. In Fact, Dont Even Tell Himher About Your Goal Or Decision Until Its A Done Deal.Its Really Okay To Share Only With Supporters Or Cheerleaders And Avoid The Naysayers Who Dont Have Helpful, Valid Objections. If You Have Close Relatives You Should Tell But Are Afraid Theyll Disrupt Your Momentum, Disclose Only When Youre So In-the-flow That Youre Bulletproof.Overall Learning: Your Best Defense Is To Watch And Listen, And Then Do What You Need To Do To Protect Your Goal.For More On This, Read Part 2, Notes From A Hypnotist: Creating A New Year Thats Way Better Than Last Year. 2008 By Wendy Lapidus-Saltz. All Rights Reserved.
